As it is quite common to have a drink and socialize with strangers, I can’t say that I’m a fan of void talk or Bullshit talk. If I run into this I’ll try to cut the conversation short or rather not engage in any of it. We as people tend to talk just to talk, not actually thinking of what we say or how we say it. We blurt out what seems to be innocent, welcoming banter, but it comes off as the individual could care less than what they appear to showcase, let me explain.
I was recently welcomed by a young lady who happened to be a fellow New Yorker like myself. I greeted her, and she greeted back. She was young, gorgeous with flowing long blond hair, great smile; a sharp dresser from head to toe. Jewelry and flashy charms that showcased she had some form of income. More than likely she was in a great financial situation in her current life, especially since she was preparing to take a trip out of the states to celebrate her birthday with her US family that has since moved to another country.
After a few pleasantries, she began to ask me how long have I been working and if I enjoy it. I told her I enjoyed for a long time what I did, but the people and the setting has taken a toll on me, because I realize people are becoming more self-absorbed than ever before. Nothing new as I said you have to adapt not just complain. Make a difference in the minute, this will eventually grow to greater things. The problem that I had was so many personal questions randomly asked afterward. I have no qualms about speaking. Grab my attention on a certain topic, and I won’t stop talking, but there was a feeling of her being disingenuous, not that this was her intention in any way, but rather the question seemed as if to pass the time because we were in the same social space.
Truthfully we owe each other nothing, I do not know you as you do not know me, and unless we were truly trying to get acquainted this Q&A is a just because and not really a get to know someone ordeal. So as the questions came in and I entertained them her answers furthered my feelings of her just responding since it’s the right thing to say in this situation, instead of listening to what I was talking about and what has upset or discouraged me during certain circumstances I’ve faced. Finally, I decided to open up, and I told her about my website (which is important to me) stating its very new and I’m still in the learning phase of it all, but I do intend to increase the content and vision of this site. I’m blessed to have the ability to put words on a screen to convey an open message along with the pictures that I have taken for a proper visual. She visits the site scrolls through appreciating the photography, and asked me “Did I take the pictures?” I responded, “yes.” Her response was “cool.” And that was it. -_- She didn’t click on anything she didn’t read any of the poetry, she didn’t read any of my pieces or ask a follow-up. She looked said “nice pictures” and went back to the app she was on and stayed busy. Full disclosure she has every right to do what she wants to do with her time, at the end of the day she went to the website, so I thank her for that but take your coat off, get comfy, look around a bit. Otherwise, why inquire so much? Understand I have no qualm with her response, but my thoughts is based on behavior she displayed and so many others. Frankly, what was the reason she or anyone for that matter create a pseudo-interest. When clearly you’re passing the time or have no desire to further the conversation beyond the surface of what is presented?
It’s a disservice to ask multiple questions just to pull out information, that is more throwaway dialogue than intrested patron. When anyone decides to truly tell you how they feel or what they intend to accomplish it gets cast aside as that’s nice and I wish you well. In the lady’s defense, I’m sure that is not how she intended to come off but rather why go through the motions of asking generic questions? Questions that you deep down didn’t really care about asking but did so to pass the time. Is this a commonly used business tactic to extract what can be taken away for personal use then the rest is insignificant? If so, how has this plagued typical day to day dialogue for so long? The inquiry of so what do you do? Are you married? Where do you live? Why does any of this matter? Unless you are truly getting to know the individual why go through this BS loop of insignificant Q&A. It’s not the person that matters but again the status, location, and title. I feel like this is an American thing that has been integrated into the rest of the world.
Anyway since I opted to actually entertain, what I seemingly knew was the void of Bullshit and share with you, something I’m passionate about. Since you’ve asked me previously seven other questions of “intrigue” giving seven substandard responses as if what we were talking about was fascinating enough to hold your attention, let’s delve into things of importance and let me showcase to you my creativity and newfound workspace of solid material. I can assure you, going through a couple of my pieces you will exit the website feeling at minimum more conscious then how you came in. Thus my site should provide insight into my thinking, visuals and open up as I said in my about page hopefully an inner eye that resides in you. Even as typing this I laugh because with all of that being said. The gorgeous young lady responded with: “Did you take these pictures?” My answer yes. She followed up with: “Cool.” That was the end of that. Nothing else to see here, thanks for coming out.
I guess, not picking on her but the representation that she imposed: To pseudo-care about someone or something when in fact you don’t. You asked common questions that anyone can do without. You wanted to ask questions that would seem as if you want to get to know someone but its filler; like Naruto’s many Anime Arc’s or The Fly episode in Breaking Bad, extending the Governor Arc in The Walking Dead, or that goofy Wolf investigation on the X-Files 6 episode special (I’m sure you get what I’m saying, or maybe I got too nerdy there). Basically, it’s not needed. When we speak to each other as if we are really enjoying the time spent with one another instead of waiting our turn to speak and respond because this sounds cool, then our conversations become elevated. Our interest becomes piqued, and we stop concerning ourselves with who has what title but who is the person in front of us at this very moment and how can we learn from each other for an even greater sense of self.
What can I pass on to the next person in my everyday travels as I navigate life? No matter where that person is in their journey, just enjoy them and their company if they’re not bringing harm to you; simply leave them to their devices. Conversation is fruitful when people care more about the person and not what they can do for them in the short term. Otherwise, we’re just wasting each others time, and for all of that we mine as well just sit there quietly and enjoy our drink.